Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

Conversion?

Posted in God, Jesus Christ, Prayer, Uncategorized, tagged , , , , , , , , on April 9, 2012| Leave a Comment »

I mentioned to a loved one recently that I was so thankful for the conversion of our oldest daughter.  They got this bewildered look and said, “Conversion?  What did she convert to?”  When I said, “To Christianity”.  He said, “But wasn’t she already a Christian?”

If you had asked her for a religious preference she would have put down Christian.  She could have recited some bible verses for you.  She would even tell you that Jesus was God’s Son and that He died for the sins of the world.  But was He Lord of her life, I know she would tell us no, he was not Lord of her life.  And this makes all the difference.

Judas was one of the 12 persons closest to Jesus.  From the hundreds of followers Jesus selected just 12 to become His disciples.  These men were given intimate access to Him for 3 years as He healed, taught, traveled, and preached across Israel.  Judas knew Jesus personally… closely.  Judas was committed to the cause.  He had given Jesus his life.  But, he had not given Jesus his heart.

There is a school of thought that Judas’ betrayal of Jesus was based upon a misguided attempt by Judas to “force Jesus hand” to make Him declare Himself king.  The main thinking is that Judas was simply a greedy manipulator that Jesus selected knowing he would be a willing pawn in satan’s plan to have Him killed.  Either way, Judas chose his own way rather than to put his whole trust in Jesus.  At this crucial point in history his heart guided him to forsake an intimate life with Jesus and the family of God to do his own thing.

Although everyone’s story is unique, our daughter’s conversion has the characteristics that define a heart surrender to Jesus.

  • She had lived her life following her own rules for a long time, long enough to know that it didn’t fulfill her.
  • She recognized that there was something more, a sense of joy and peace that some people possessed that she couldn’t seem to attain.  She could do happiness and laughter, but these were always for the short-term.
  • She recognized that she did some things that broke even her own rules.  And that she broke God’s rules even more.
  • She came to a point of a broken heart.  She wanted to be a better person.
  • She trusted God.  She asked Him to help her.  She surrendered her heart to Him.
  • He entered her life and made her a “new creation”.
  • The transformation on the inside began immediately and it is visible on the outside as well.
  • She had worn a lot of masks and her life contained a good bit of lies and half-truths.  Part of the transformation is that she and God are identifying and discarding these.  This process, which the bible calls sanctification, is a life-long activity.
  • Today she is practicing reconciliation on a consistent basis.
  • She has given up several habits that were either harmful to her and others or were simply not helpful to growing in her new life in Christ.
  • She and her husband are closer than they ever have been as they are growing together.
  • She is devouring the bible and the Holy Spirit is opening her mind to the truth it contains.

I could go on, but the point is established – there is a fundamental difference between knowing about Jesus and knowing Jesus.  When you know Jesus, His love captures you and your heart is His.  You can know about Jesus and not experience the life-change that comes from a conversion experience.

On Easter 2000 years ago, Jesus emerged from the grave alive.  He is the living Lord.  No one else has ever died for you and risen.  Since He is alive, He is available to meet and talk with you.  It is His desire to meet with you.  To talk with you.  To help you with your needs.  To show you the right path.  To be your friend first.  But to also be your Lord.

Everyone has gods that they serve.  Some are obviously bad for us.  Others, like religion, promise to help us please God.  Religion is man’s attempt to reach God.  But God came to us.  He wants relationship, not religion.  Religion is like the workaholic father who buys his wife and kids all the stuff they want but does not invest time with them face-to-face.  Stuff and activity on their behalf is not what is needed.  Intimacy… time… relationship is what is important.  Religion can never substitute for relationship.  The best it can do is help give depth IF the relationship with God through Jesus already exists.  The worst it can do is kill people in the name of god.  More on this in another post.

God sent His Son, Jesus to live, die, and live again for you and for me.  Trust Him.  Seek Him.  Give Him your heart and you will KNOW that He is, that He loves you, and that He will live with you from now on.

If you want an intimate life with God speak to Him now.  You can pray this prayer.  You can be specific about where you miss the mark.  And about your needs.  He knows them already, but it helps us when we give them voice and share them with Him.

God, I come to you right now asking for your help.  I have run my life for so long and frankly I have made a mess of things so many times.  I am sorry for the times I have missed the mark.  I am sorry for the times I have sinned against you and others.  Please forgive me.  I turn away from my sin and I turn to you.  I want you in my life.  I want to be a new creation.  Thank you Jesus for hearing my prayer.  Thank you Lord for forgiving my sin.  Thank you Father for guiding my life from this moment on.  I give you my heart.  I accept your Lordship over every area of my life.  I give myself to you.  And it’s in the name of Jesus that I pray.  Amen.

If you prayed that prayer tell someone.  Tell me if you do not have any other believers around.  Just comment back to me.

Scripture to read – 2 Corinthians 5:17, Romans 5:1-5, Ephesians 2:1-10

God bless you today and always.

Read Full Post »

He’s ALIVE!!!

Posted in Uncategorized, tagged , , , , , on April 8, 2012| Leave a Comment »

An hour and a half before sunrise the women found the spices and death dressings they had made for the Body and quietly slipped outside. As they gathered few words were used although silent embraces spoke of the pain and grief each one felt.  The past few days were a blur of confusion.  Just days before He had entered town to such fanfare and adoration – “Hosanna!  Blessed is He that comes in the Name of the Lord.  Hosanna in the highest.”  They had thought that perhaps this was the time He would be proclaimed as king.  The miracles that they had seen with their own eyes… even unto to some of them, was surely a testament to God’s great power that was with Him.  And yet today they were going to dress His body for the final time and His tomb would be sealed… forever.

Someone broke the silent contemplation with a very practical question.  “Who will roll away the stone?”  They had been there as Joseph and Nicodemus hastily prepared His body on the eve of the Sabbath.  The large stone weighing 2 tons or more was rolled down over the opening just before they left.  “Perhaps the guards will help us.” another said.  Word had gotten to His followers that a Roman guard had been posted at the tomb.  There would be four soldiers when they arrived.  They all remembered the centurion who was stationed at the cross when He had died.  He knew He was not a common criminal, but a righteous man.  He showed kindness toward the family.  “Perhaps…”

As they neared the tomb, the ground shook violently for a few moments.  On top of the grief, now they had a new terror seize them.  But as quickly as it came, it subsided.  They picked themselves up and now hurried to the tomb.  When they arrived the guards – seasoned, battle-hardened warriors, were on the ground looking as though they had seen a ghost.  The women’s attention did not remain on the guards, but rather jumped to the tomb.  The stone was gone and the tomb was OPEN.  What has happened?  When they looked inside they could see the clothes and spices used to wrap the Body, but the BODY WAS GONE.

“Do not be afraid.”  They looked and a man dressed in a white robe was sitting inside the tomb.  “You are looking for Jesus of Nazareth who was crucified.  He has risen!  He is not here.  See the place where they laid Him.  Go tell His disciples and Peter.  He is alive…”

Jesus suffered death, but death did not… could not hold Him.  Death was introduced into the world when Adam and Eve first sinned.  And since then life’s end was always death.  But with sinless Jesus and His selfless, loving sacrifice the whole order of things was turned on its head.  Death suddenly gave way to life.  Jesus made a new way.  Jesus is the new way.

Mary Magdalene did not put all these thoughts together at that time, but she knew that hope was rekindled in her heart.  It still fought with the fear and confusion of the strange things she was seeing and hearing, but hope had begun again.  Why Jesus picked Mary as the first to see Him is a mystery.  She was a woman who had suffered much, but who had been touched by the Master’s hand and delivered by His word.  It may have been because she pushed herself past her grief to do what had to be done and she was in a place to see Him.  It probably had to do with the hope that was attempting to rise up in her heart and convince her mind that He really was alive.  I am certain at least part of the reason was because Jesus knew her need and stepped in.  But Mary was the first to see the risen Lord.

As I watch the sky brighten in the east this morning signalling a new day about to begin, I think back to that new day.  Everything changed that day.  Death is no longer the end for those who know Jesus.  The power of sin can is broken as we surrender to the One who died to break sin’s hold over us.  God is real.  God is love.  God cares for us.  And God is a person who can and does relate directly with us if we but take the time to seek Him.

Alleluia, He is risen.  The Lord is risen indeed.  Alleluia!

Read Full Post »

Good Friday, 2012

Posted in Uncategorized, tagged , , , , , , , , on April 6, 2012| Leave a Comment »

We are on vacation at the beach for our youngest son’s spring break.  Last night the clouds rolled in with showers and thunderstorms.  I had intentions of getting up early and watching the sunrise on Good Friday morning, but the weather forecast was calling for rain all day on Friday.  I off-handedly said, “Well I guess there won’t be a sunrise tomorrow.”  My wife, whether knowingly or not said something that this morning seems rather profound.  “Honey, there’s always a sunrise.  It’s just that not everyone sees it.” 

As I reflect upon her statement this morning I realize that her statement is true whether she meant sunrise or Sonrise.  It is sad, but all too true that we often miss the meaningful because we have our eyes, our thoughts, or our attention on the trivial.  As I sat in the sand this morning with grey, scuttling clouds racing by overhead and the merest hints of color in a few scattered openings in the otherwise thick clouds, I thought about the sun that is out there rising behind those clouds.  Other people are in places where they can see it clearly and they know the sun is there.  I have seen the sun rise before and the brightening sky tells me that even though I don’t see him he is still there.  But for some all they can see are the clouds, the rain, and the disruption of their plans.  Sitting in the sand waiting and listening I saw much that I would not have noticed otherwise…

Pelicans, an otherwise odd-looking bird, looking so graceful as they fly up the beach in groups of from 3 – 25 in swooping lines just inches above the crashing surf.

The undulating pattern of the sand dunes covered with sea oats forming both a scenic and protective barrier for the homes and villas behind.

The furthest sawgrass toward the ocean.  Standing at the very edge of the surf, this little tuft gets the abuse of wind, wave, and the occasional beach walker, yet still holds his ground… literally.

The sky itself with a few pink highlights to the east and south while looking foreboding with dark greys and blues to the north and west. 

And then remembering that by this time on Good Friday, Jesus had already been tried and convicted in a mock trial, beaten within the confines of the Jewish council, and was probably on his way to be whipped by the Roman soldiers.  Still ahead the long walk to Calvary carrying His cross until He was no longer able.  The nails hammered through his wrists and feet to affix Him to the cross.  Then the unbearable pain as the cross is raised to the vertical and all the weight of His body rests upon the three nails… 

And His cry after hours of pain and suffering – “My God, My God.  Why have You forsaken Me?” 

God didn’t answer out loud, but His answer resonates today – “Because I love them.”

People say that Valentines Day is the Day of Love.  I disagree.  It is a day of romance and while love is an essential component of true romance, Valentines Day is not the ultimate demonstration of love.  The most amazing demonstration of Love was on the original Good Friday.  Jesus, pure and innocent Jesus, offered up for us.  He loves us more than we can comprehend.  God loves us so much He offered up His Son.  Jesus loves us so much He offered up Himself. 

If you know Him, please join me in worship and adoration of our loving Lord. 

If you don’t already know Him, please consider His offer of love.  He will not force Himself upon you.  But He does desire your response.  He loves you and wants to fill you with His love.  It is the best thing in all the world.

Have a blessed day today.

Read Full Post »

Humility… “Yo Dogs – The Old Guy Needs You!”

Posted in Uncategorized, tagged , , , , on April 6, 2012| 3 Comments »

Humility is a virtue much esteemed by God.  James 4:6 tells us that : “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.”  The problem with humility is that it leaves no room for selfishness, self-centeredness, and pride – traits that are natural and easy.  Humility is an essential virtue for us to live in right relation with God and with our fellow-man.  Jesus summed up the law in two love commandments.  “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind…Love your neighbor as yourself.”  An inordinate self-love is an obstacle to this all out love for God and others.  Interestingly, as we grow to love God and others more we come to the place where we see ourselves as God sees us.  We develop an appropriate love for ourselves which is not based upon some caricature the world, the flesh, or the devil tries to get us to accept. 

I have a true story that illustrates how the process of humility can be worked out.  I am in my early 50’s now.  A few years ago as I was nearing 50 I took my wife, our then 15-year-old son and a friend of his to Table Rock mountain for a day of hiking.  We set out to summit the mountain about noon.  The sign at the bottom indicated that we needed 5 hours for the hike.  Since it was early spring we could do it, but we would be getting down back to the parking area pretty close to dark.  I told the boys that we might have to hurry at times which to them sounded like fun.  My wife chose not to climb the mountain with us.  Something about the look in my eye when I said we might have to hurry discouraged her participation.

I took my nice digital SLR camera because I enjoy photography.  Up the trail we went.  The boys took me literally as we alternately jogged and walked our way to the top of the mountain.  The view from the top was spectacular and we stayed  close to an hour taking pictures and eating lunch.  When we started back down the boys again slipped into “hurry mode” and began jogging and hiking.  Actually it was more of a run than a jog.  As the boys picked up speed and added distance between us I was forced to run to keep up.  On at least three occasions as I was running, holding my fairly large camera to keep it safe, the thought ran through my head… “I’ve still got it… I can still move great… Dan’s still the man!”  I distinctly remember thinking this as I bounded from the top of one boulder to another boulder to another.  And for each of those three times the verse from the Old Testament would quickly follow in a gentle whisper – “Pride goes before the fall.”  Now I have to admit something here that I have not mentioned in the numerous renditions of this story with my family.  Each of those times I slowed down.  Not because I was truly worried about myself, but because I thought of the possible damage I would do to my camera. 

About halfway down the mountain the boys started to get some separation from me… and that bothered me.  At one point a couple of young girls – about 11 – 13 years old I guessed stepped into the trail in front of me and started walking slowly down the mountain chatting about boys and such.  Did I mentioned how ssslllooowwwllllyyyyyy they were walking?  While I could hear the boys at first the sound of their noisy dash down the mountain grew fainter and fainter.  And I was growing more and more impatient.  Finally my chance came as the trail split around a tree.  As the girls took the left side of the tree I accelerated to pass them on the right side.  I thought I would be polite and say, “Girls, I’m passing on the right”, but all I got out was “Gir…” as my toe hooked a rock and I started into my fall.  You know how people describe a traumatic experience where everything goes into slow motion.  Well the fall was kind of like that.  I realized that I was taking a tumble and there was no way I was going to get my feet under me.  I thought of my camera, I thought of how silly I must look, I thought “why am I running down a mountain?”  

For a moment I was tumbling and suddenly I was stopped in a pile of numbness on the ground.  I remember slowly standing up and feeling the buzz of adrenalin.  My first thought was my camera… did I break it?  I knew that my immediate reaction as I began to fall was to pull it in and protect it with my body.  As I am inspecting my camera the girls had come up.  “Mister are you awright?”  “Mister can we hep you?”  “Are you OK, mister?”  A quick inventory told me my camera was probably okay.  The fact that I was now standing told me that the pain in my leg was probably not a broken bone although it was a huge Charley horse.  The girls pointed out that I had broken something – my nice Costa Del Mar sunglasses that were hanging crookedly across my face.  “Mister can we do anything for ya?”  To which I replied, “Yeah, please call those boys and ask them to come back.” 

As I continued to take an inventory of where I hurt, I heard one of the girls walk over to the edge where the mountain drops steeply down and yell, “Yo, Yo Dogs – The OLD Guy Needs You!”  So if the fall, the broken glasses, and the multiple pains were not bad enough, then the OLD Guy phrase really made an excellent point of the whole Pride is Not My Friend message of the day.  But things were not over.  The boys came, helped me get going and them promptly headed down the mountain at a rapid pass again.  There was no more running down the mountain for me.  Actually there was barely limping down the mountain.

Now I have a running line that I share with people that I once prayed for humility and the next day I met my future wife.  It is a joke that brings a chuckle on most occasions.  Lisa is a bright woman the Lord has used greatly to help mold and shape my life.  On this particular day it appeared that God really wanted to drive the whole Pride is a Bad Thing point home with forcefulness.  As I hobbled up to the car Lisa was in the passenger seat.  I came up to her side and asked if she could drive.   Her chuckle became all out laughter as the boys shared the story with her.  And the story has become one of the family favorites when we get together.  Lisa’s friend in Louisiana always refers to me as “the OLD guy” now, never my real name.  Oh well, I am sure the reminder is a positive thing even if I do come out looking silly.

My father had a heart attack in his early 50″s.  I remember his first words to me as I walking into the hospital CICU room with him connected to various monitors and IV’s.  “Son, I am so glad the Lord will do whatever it takes to get my attention.”  Today, I have to echo that sentiment.  I wish I learned my lessons simply by reading about them, but sometimes it takes more.  Our Father knew that and He provided a lesson in humility for me that continues to resonate to this day.  Thank You Lord for all You have done, even when it hurts!

Have a blessed day and be a blessing!

Read Full Post »

Ownership

Posted in Uncategorized, tagged , , , , on April 4, 2012| 2 Comments »

In the work I do ownership is a key concept. I help heavy industrial plants become more reliable.  In the majority of plants we see a “renter’s mentality” rather than a sense of ownership in the work being performed.  This is not to disparage people who find themselves in a situation where they must rent a place to live.  I have been both a renter and an owner and I know that my attitude toward the property is different depending upon my position.  The value I have for the property is higher if I own it than just renting it.  We have found this to be true in the workplace as well.  Employees who feel closely engaged with their work, who have a genuine sense that what they do, think, and say matters are better at what they do.  The results from the owner mentality plants is consistently superior to those where the work is just a way to earn money.  This is a truth that applies in all areas of life.

A quick scan of other areas where ownership versus participation makes a difference – marriage, parenting, friendships, our faith.  They are all made richer if we are fully engaged.  In Jeremiah God says “you will seek Me and you will find Me when you seek Me with your whole heart.”  Ownership is a whole heart activity.  The phrase “God has no grandchildren” gave me pause when I first heard it.  I now understand it to mean that God desires and freely offers the intimacy of being His child to anyone who would come to Him.  We cannot simply rely on the faith of others like our parents, but we must own our relationship with Him.

Let me highlight just a few of the components that I have observed about ownership.

1) Ownership takes effort.  I own a home which means I always have a list of things that need to be done.  There are those activities that are maintenance to keep things functioning as they should and there are those which will improve the home.  This is equally true in our work, marriage, and faith.

2) I don’t know everything that needs to be done, nor am I an expert at doing everything that needs to be done, but I am responsible.  Around my house I do as many of the tasks as I can.  In a few cases I can get instructions from owner manuals, from the internet, or from experts and then I do the task.  I repaired a rototiller last spring with help from Google.  However I have an air conditioner that isn’t cooling.  I will call an expert today and get them to come and repair it.  The point here is that as an owner I can’t sit around and wait for someone else to get the work done.  Complaining is not going to solve the situation.  I have to do the work.

3) I am neither the only owner nor am I the most experienced.  My wife and I are co-owners of our home.  There are some things that she has more knowledge and ability on.  Some are my expertise.  Some we have to seek the experience of others.  I can learn from others to be a better owner.  I call my Dad from time to time to get his advice.  He has been an owner for a lot longer than me and he helps me avoid pitfalls.  I also talk to my neighbors and weigh their advice into the ownership decisions I make. 

4) Ownership has rewards.  Since I own my home I can install a swing for my grandson if I wish.  Hearing him chuckle as he swings is a great reward.  Adding landscaping or a garden to rental property is not right since your investment is simply given to the owner of the property.  But in your own home this provides beauty and value to your property and enjoyment to you and your family. 

5) As an owner I have a direct impact upon the “total cost of ownership”.  As a renter I have to pay the negotiated rent – period.  I may have some latitude on utilities, but after I decide where to rent I have no influence on the cost.  As an owner I have some flexibility in my expenses.  Ultimately I have a significant cost to be paid back, but I have options on how I structure this.  I also have discretion on extra expenses that may arise like do I add an extra room, do I remodel a bathroom, etc.

6) Owners value what they own because it is theirs.  Renters do not hold a high value for what they rent because it is not theirs.

I have taken a lot of time spelling out this difference in perspective because I see it in so many areas of life.  Beyond home ownership, I see it in how people treat conservation.  Even with so much encouragement to value the environment many still trash the earth.  I have already mentioned that within the work place we clearly see the positive difference it makes when employees have that sense of ownership.  A marriage cannot be successful without both parties owning the union. 

In our relationship with the Lord, ownership comes in as well.  God is our Creator and Sustainer.  We would not be if it weren’t for His intentional thought toward us.  And we would immediately cease to exist if He pulled His continuing love and kindness away.  However He does not force a relationship upon us.  He gives us good reason to enter in and He draws us with His love, but He gives us the right to choose.  The longer we wait, the longer we live in a renter like relationship with Him.  We can exist in that mode, but we miss out on so much living.  God intended us to own the lives He has given us, to be fully engaged.  Even though He is our Creator and Sustainer, He gives us a life to live on purpose for Him.  We have an owner’s manual (the Bible) and an expert (the Holy Spirit) to ask for guidance, but ultimately God leaves ownership decisions to us. 

If you are not His child, I encourage you to ask Him to help you to know Him.  He loves you and is calling you to a richer, fuller life than you have ever imagined.  If you are His, but life feels more like a rental and you do not value who you are or what you do, then by all means call out to God and ask Him to help you understand what it means to own the life He has given you.  I urge you to read “The Purpose-driven Life” by Rick Warren.  It is an outstanding supplement to the owner’s manual I mentioned before as Rick illustrates 40 key points that help us understand why we are here and how we can own this life we’ve been given.  My oldest daughter is half-way through the Purpose-driven life and you can read about her journey in her blog – growingthroughchrist.wordpress.com. 

Have a blessed day today as you take ownership of the life you’ve been given.

Read Full Post »

The Family Jesus Loved…

Posted in Uncategorized, tagged , , , , , on April 3, 2012| 1 Comment »

John the Apostle is refered to several times as the “disciple Jesus loved”. John was probably a relatively young teenager during Jesus’ ministry and the fondness that Jesus showed him was one of the reasons the nickname stuck. I’ve noticed a family in the scripture who may earn a similar moniker – the siblings Lazarus, Mary, and Martha. They are mentioned several times as hosts for Jesus and they play a prominent role in one of Jesus’ most amazing demonstrations of His deity and God’s power. Nearing the end of His time on earth Jesus raises His good friend Lazarus after He has been dead for four days. Let’s take a look at this family a little closer.

We first read of Martha and Mary in Luke 10:35 when Jesus stops by and teaches in their home.  Martha, the frantic hostess, is busy bustling around making all manner of preparations for the gathered crowd while sister Mary sits at Jesus’s feet soaking up His teaching.  Martha is gently rebuked as she requests Jesus to tell her sister to join her in the preparations for the men.  Instead Jesus tells Martha to relax and that Mary has chosen the most important thing… sitting at Jesus feet and hearing the words of life that He is sharing. 

The second time we meet this family is in John 11 when the brother Lazarus dies.  The beginning of this particular story always intrigues me.  Jesus is informed that Lazarus is ill and near to death and yet He waits 2 more days before leaving.  As many of the persons around Him knew, Jesus had healed so many sick persons that undoubtedly He could heal a sick Lazarus.  Yet Jesus waited.  Now if it was anyone but Jesus I would be tempted to say He hesitated  trying to figure out what to do.  But Jesus didn’t hesitate.  He is always right on time.  He is never late nor is He ever too early.  By waiting Jesus arrives after Lazarus has been dead for 4 days.  In this story we see how deeply Jesus is moved by the emotions He has for this family.  His love for them shows as He weeps with Martha and Mary over their loss even though He knows He will soon raise Lazarus and restore him to his family.  Hopefully I will get a chance to unpack this story more at a later date since it is so rich and full of messages for us.  Today I have something else to share.

The last time we see this family distinctly is in John 12.  It is only 6 days before Jesus’ crucifixion although no one but Jesus is aware of His imminent passion.  Jesus is in the home with the family again in Bethany which is 2 miles from Jerusalem.  While He is reclining at the table Mary takes a very expensive jar of nard, a perfume with which she anoints Jesus’ feet.  She then wipes His feet with her hair.  This creates  a stir.  Some are indignant because the value of the nard could be used to feed the poor.  I am sure others are simply shocked by the unadulterated display of love and submission Mary made.  At the very least I would say the situation is awkward and uncomfortable for the majority.  Yet Jesus again steps in to Mary’s defense.  He sees the deeper meaning in what she is doing.  Without realizing why, Mary has responded to the prompting within and has anointed Jesus for burial.

While these are three specific times we see Jesus with this family, I am sure there are plenty of other times they shared time together.  The closeness we see between the Lord and Lazarus, Mary, and Martha is a picture of what the Lord desires for every family.  The Lord loves them as unique people and He relates to them right where they are.  The only rebuke He gives this family is the gently given rebuke to Martha when she asks the Lord to scold Mary for not helping her.  (Boy does that one hit me square between the eyes.)   Jesus’ love for each one is clear in the emotions He demonstrates and the time He spends with them.

It is my firm belief that Jesus’ plan of redemption flows through the family.  Even before the Church, God values family.  When He transforms a life through His love and the power of His Holy Spirit, the first people God will touch is our family.  If there are broken and damaged relationships then God, who has called us to be ministers of reconciliation, will guide us to share His love in tangible ways to heal those relationships.  If there are estranged members of the family then God will put in us the desire to pray and seek out those that are lost.  Where there is stress and worry, the Lord will ask us to minister His peace.  Where there is doubt we are to consistently trust and allow Him to build faith within us that is visible to our family. 

A quick word of warning from my experience and that of others.  There are plenty of wrong ways to go about convincing others of truth.  Jesus never bullied people.  A living faith is not based upon a forced conversion.  The Holy Spirit is a gentlemen and He does not force people against their will.  However the Holy Spirit is God and He knows us intimately.  Because He loves us and desires us to live in relationship with Him, He is able to bring us to the point of decision using our intellect, our emotions, or the  combination of all we are.  As believing family members reaching out within our family we must simply seek to work in concert with the Holy Spirit to reach them.  It is God’s desire that they know Him even more than we desire it.  Our prayer and our obedience are primary tools God will use.  The plan and timing are His though. 

We’ve looked at a family in the bible that Jesus clearly loved.  He was engaged with them individually and as a family.  They are an example to us of how He wants to relate to us as well… as individuals and as an entire family committed to Him.

Walk in the power of His resurrection life and be a blessing today!

Read Full Post »

Approaching Holy Week

Posted in Uncategorized, tagged , , , , , , on March 28, 2012| Leave a Comment »

Only a small percentage of us approach the end of our earthly life with the clear-sighted focus that Jesus did.  Jesus came to this earth on purpose and with a purpose.  The culmination of that purpose was found in Holy Week.  Holy week is the pivotal week in human history and Easter morning is the crux of it all.  Sadly to many are not aware of the wonder of this glorious day or they are so distracted that they fail to prepare for it and miss the precious gift that it offers.  Today I offer a few tips to make the most of Holy Week.

First, if you are not aware, Jesus stands alone as unique among all persons who have ever lived.  Jesus was killed by the ancient Roman custom of crucifixion.  He was confirmed dead and put into the tomb owned by a Jewish leader, Joseph of Arimathea.  Jesus did not stay in the tomb though.  God raised Him up to life after three days.  This really happened.  It was foretold ahead of time by prophets.  Jesus said it would happen.  And literally hundreds of witnesses saw Jesus alive after His resurrection.  Jesus is the only person who has ever lived, died, and lived again in their earthly body.

There are points that critics bring up to try to dispute the fact of Jesus resurrection.  They all need a conspiracy of some sort to show why Jesus body has never been found.  Every single theory falls flat though when the evidence is analyzed.  In his book, Born Again, Chuck Colson who was a member of President Richard Nixon’s inner team explains how he was convinced that Jesus was resurrected.  President Nixon resigned in disgrace when it was learned that he knew about efforts to coverup involvement in certain illegal political activities.  Chuck Colson was in the small group who knew about this.  Chuck was among those that served prison time for their role in the coverup.  The fact that a small group of people faithfully committed to one of the most powerful persons in the world at that time couldn’t keep a secret was very telling.  Colson then draws a parallel to the 12 apostles, Jesus’ inner circle.  These men who were supposed conspirators in foisting the Jesus is Alive story all the while knowing they had stolen His body.  The fact that these 12 men went throughout the world spreading the story of Jesus resurrection.  The final end of 11 of the 12 was martyrdom.  They were executed for their faith and the message they proclaimed.  This is very telling.  A person may, and I emphasize may, die for something they strongly believe to be true.  But to die for something you know to be a lie, it doesn’t happen.  And for all of them to die for a lie takes immeasurably more faith than to believe the wealth of evidence that says Jesus truly is alive.

So point one as we approach Holy Week is that Jesus is Alive.  This brings on the question – So what?  What does Jesus’ death and resurrection mean to me?  I mentioned before that Holy Week is the pivotal point in all of human history.  That is a huge statement, but I believe it to be true from both a sociological point of view and from a personal point of view.  I shared in one of my early posts about my conversion.  This speaks to how my life has been changed by Jesus.  My oldest daughter has recently found new life in Christ and she is writing about it in her blog growingthroughchrist.wordpress.com.  Since Jesus was raised from the dead, everything He said suddenly changes from good advice from a wise man, to words from God.  He is different from prophets.  Prophets occasionally spoke words from God.  They were still fully human and for that reason we can find prophets who make mistakes.  Jesus didn’t make mistakes.

Jesus was the sinless Son of God who came to earth with a very specific purpose.  He lived long enough to prove His deity.  He touched lives mainly within the Jewish people of that day.  But His primary purpose was culminated in Holy Week when He willingly offered Himself up as a sacrifice in our place.  Sin cannot go unpunished.  Sin separates us from God and if not atoned for, will keep us forever separate from God.  Jesus took our sin, my sin, upon Himself when He died on the cross.  Unless you have put your faith in Jesus, that sin is not atoned for.  I know that God works in our lives even before we come to faith.  Faith itself is a gift from God.  Faith is what happens when we trust God.

One last thing before I close for the day.  I have discussed Jesus with a number of people.  The one thing I have found is that no one has ever been able to refute the historical and logical conclusions of the evidence surrounding Jesus life and death.  I am an engineer.  I am wired to think in a logical way.  (Which at times drives my family to distraction.)  When based purely upon well researched evidence, a jury would have to say Jesus was resurrected from the dead.  (For excellent research on this topic read Josh McDowell’s Evidence that Demands a Verdict.) In many cases where I have had this discussion, the person I was speaking with chose to ignore the facts in deference to their own world view.  In most cases they held a belief that contrasted squarely with biblical teaching on moral law that they were not willing to give up.  In other words they chose to build a world view that allowed them to do what they wanted and not try to find truth and then go where truth led them.  I have seen this enough to understand the powerful persuasiveness of sin.  But I also know the incredible freedom and joy that I now have through my relationship with God.

This is my encouragement to you.  As you approach Holy Week meditate upon the resurrection.  See if God is speaking to you about a life decision.  Ask Him to give you faith to believe for your next step in a relationship with Him.  If you do not have a church home, check out NewSpring.cc on the internet.  I pray this will be the most amazing Easter you have ever experienced.  God bless you today.

Read Full Post »

Thankful Heart

Posted in Uncategorized, tagged , , , on March 27, 2012| 1 Comment »

A thankful heart is a shield, an antidote, and a bridge. Psalm 138 begins, “I give You thanks O God with my whole heart.” It is our right response.  God is the giver of all good gifts and He is worthy of all praise and thanksgiving.  And within this dynamic world He has made, thanksgiving freely offered releases God’s power in marvelous ways.

A thankful heart is a shield.  Bad things happen in life.  Some we can see coming while others we cannot.  Our response to difficulties shapes us more than anything if we let it.  During difficulty it is easy to lose sight of the things most helpful… that God loves us, that He is with us, that God truly cares for us.  These truths, and they are fundamental truths that remain even when all hell breaks loose against us, are a bulwark against fear, doubt, despair, and the host of other negatives that accompany pain and loss.  When we focus our eyes upon Jesus and give Him thanks for what He has provided, a wall against the secondary effects of difficulties is set in place to protect our heart.  Pain, suffering, and grief are not removed.  They are natural and right responses which will eventually diminish.  However despair, hatred, revenge and other attitudes are not God’s best for us.  Thanksgiving sets a barrier against the intentional acts of the enemy to keep us down.

A thankful heart is an antidote.  Giving thanks to God, not only in the midst of a bad thing, but for the bad thing, requires an act of faith.  When we do our faith is enlarged and the load we carry becomes a bit lighter.  But thankfulness should also spring forth when things are going fine.  Complacency is one of the most subtle and effective of satan’s tactics.  When we are complacent and satisfied we are prone to believe that we are fine and we have everything under control.  Thankfulness at this point is essential to propel us toward the vibrant faith and action to which God has called us.  Perhaps the most obvious area where thankfulness serves as an antidote is when things are going great.  At the point of receiving good news it is right to open our hearts and mouth in immediate thanksgiving and praise to God.  Pride is a real challenge for the persons who have much.  True thanksgiving springs from a humble heart.  It is based upon the recognition that there is One greater who has provided the gift and verbalizes this reality.

A thankful heart is a bridge.  One of the most powerful acts a person can give is forgiveness.  Jesus exhorts us to forgive one another as the Father has forgiven us.  Our natural tendency is to hold on to our anger until we achieve justice (or more precisely justice as we see it).  The Lord knows that grudges only do damage.  And they generally do much more damage to the person holding the grudge than to the one who is the focal point of the grudge.  How do you find forgiveness when you have a legitimate complaint against another?  I have found that when I consider God’s legitimate complaint against me for ignoring His standard for living, for breaking His law, for treating His overwhelming love and grace with low regard and yet He died on a cross for me, I am thankful.  And from that place of thankfulness I can extend forgiveness toward another.  In this way a thankful heart begins building the bridge.

We have so much to be thankful for – we can begin with the things of beauty God has placed in our lives.  I saw a beautiful sunset last night that was worthy of a “thank You, Lord”.  The people who God has placed in our lives.  My son-in-law called last night and we had a great chat.  “Thanks for calling Jeff, and thank You Lord for another son in my later years.”  My wife who makes me laugh… a lot.  “Thank you Lisa for the sparkle and spice you bring to my life, and thank You Lord for the blessing of a soul mate whom I love and who loves me.”  Now I am giving examples from the last hour or so of my evening and I could name many more.  Yet just that little bit has me so encouraged and thankful to our Father that I am ready for the day.  That makes me think of one more benefit of a thankful heart – it is a motivator.

Lord give us eyes to see Your hand at work in our lives today.  Then give us thankful hearts to express the gratitude that You most assuredly deserve. 

Read Full Post »

Truth and Transparency

Posted in Marriage, Uncategorized, tagged , , , , , , , on March 26, 2012| Leave a Comment »

Lisa and I attended a Real Marriage conference the past two days.  Pastor Mark Driscoll and his wife Grace brought the message that Real Marriage is fun.  As I have shared in earlier posts, God has done a wonderful work in our marriage over the past 2+ months and the catalyst for all of this was Lisa’s broken leg.  Our marriage has gone from OK (which means it’s a relatively successful business partnership with occasional periods of zing) to amazing in this brief a time span because we have begun practicing the majority of what Grace and Mark talked about… and we had not read the book yet.  As I listened to Mark speak I realized that for many people learning about the 4 big ideas will revolutionize their marriage.  For Lisa and I it drilled home truths that we knew as head knowledge, but we had not made heart knowledge that we acted upon consistently.  Lisa’s leg break has caused us to act from the heart much more than from the head.  I think God graciously timed this conference so we could establish these principles in our marriage from henceforth.

One more point before I dive into today’s post.  During the conference there was a brief demonstration of Logos Bible Software.  It looks like a great tool for really digging into the Word of God.  They picked out this verse from John 4.  23　But the hour is coming, and is now here, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for the Father is seeking such people to worship him. 24　God is spirit, and those who worship him must worship in spirit and truth.”  Obviously the words from the original text often have other subtle shifts in meaning.  The word for truth carries with it the sense of nothing hidden or transparent.

As I awoke this morning I realized that for most of my life I have worked hard to control how I (or my family) are viewed by others.  Since becoming a Christian I have worked to be a believer who looks right, talks right, and lives right.  I believe I have missed the mark at times though because I tried to put on faith in the way of my choosing and not allow God to create that faith within me.  Ephesians makes it clear that faith is a gift from God 8 For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, 9　not a result of works, so that no one may boast. 10　For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.  Often I am more concerned with what others think that simply doing what pleases God.  The motivation was wrong.

The first “big idea” Mark and Grace introduced was that spouses must be best friends.  They gave a picture of three types of relationships.  Back-to-back which represents an unhealthy, adversarial relationship.  Shoulder-to-shoulder which represents that working together to accomplish a set of goals much like a business partnership.  And the third which is Face-to-face.  Face-to-face is the pattern God has for friendship and particularly for marriage.  We have lived in the shoulder-to-shoulder marriage for most of our almost 27 years.  It is not that I didn’t love my wife and express my commitment to her often.  But I did not look her in the eye and show her the love, respect, and admiration that she needed and I, as the husband of a wonderful woman, should provide.

The second big idea was that marriages need regular trash removal and clean up to be healthy and whole.  Marriages are unions of two sinners in need of repentance and forgiveness.  We were given examples of how to “fight” in a way that ushers in healing and growth and not ever-increasing pain and isolation.  I am sure I will speak on this more in other posts.

The third bid idea was that sex is a gift God has given within the context of marriage to be enjoyed.  This contrasts against the unholy view the world has that places sex as a god and the equally invalid view of sex as gross.  The later view unfortunately is all too common within church circles.  Again this is a topic for another time.

The last topic asked the question “Are you a selfish lover or a servant lover?”  Like so many questions of this nature, I know what the answer is supposed to be.  I mean I am in church so it has to be servant lover – right?  This is another time when the word truth and the subtle meaning of nothing hidden whacks me right between the eyes… I am still a selfish person so much of the time.  While I hate to have to admit that, it is true.  Lord help me to abandon my selfish ways, thoughts, words, and actions.

When Lisa and I first married, we immediately plunged into life at a fairly breakneck pace.  Rhiannon was just a little shy of 2 years old when we got married so we were already a family.  Lisa continued working for a brief period and then she stopped working so she could go to college full-time.  Before long the next child and then the next arrived.  Soon the Momma to do list was always longer than the what-Momma-accomplished list.

We honestly did not disagree or fight much at all.  Today I recognize that this may not have been the best thing because it allowed small issues to be stuffed away rather than dealt with and resolved.  Undercurrents of dissatisfaction began growing and this began to manifest itself in less intimacy.  I can so relate to the shoulder to shoulder kind of relationship because the relatively small amount of face-to-face we had experienced was now replaced with almost exclusively shoulder to shoulder.  Things which should have been brought out into the open and discussed were left to fester.  Sadly, but in being totally honest, the back-to-back which had never been a part of our marriage, began to show up.  Mark mentioned that a sure sign of an unhealthy friendship within the marriage was going to sleep back-to-back.  Well this had become us.

My heavy travel schedule (read busy and not at home much) and Lisa’s successful (read busy and not engaged at home much) allowed only a few opportunities to really talk about and deal with the dissatisfaction and frustration we were both feeling.

Now I have to step back just a moment in time to give you a little more background in what was going on inside of me.  I recognized that the dissatisfaction was not healthy.  I had prayed for some time for God to heal our marriage.  Now while I was open to the fact that we both probably needed to change I know my hope and intent was for God to fix Lisa.  And I thank God that He is faithful and doesn’t just leave us to our own devices.  During this period He consistently spoke to me exactly what was needed.  “Dan, love Lisa like I love the church.”  I could not get anything else… because I was not doing this.  Don’t misunderstand, I resolved every time to love Lisa better.  Reading the rest of Ephesians 5 where Paul writes about this, I knew that meant I had to die for her.  But I couldn’t.  I didn’t.

Rhiannon, our oldest daughter, recently shared how her Mom’s broken leg changed her life.  Well that is my story too.  My love for Lisa has come out of this as more real and tangible.  I recognize a difference and my beloved does as well.  A lot of selfishness has been blown away.  (I look forward to the day when ALL of it is gone, but until then I am walking by faith.)  It’s really funny, before Lisa broke her leg I would get frustrated that I had to come home from 3 or 4 days away and I had to do a “lot” of household chores.  Today I am doing at least 4 times that and not only am I not frustrated, I am happy to be a help to Lisa.  It is amazing.

On Lisa’s side a transformation is taking place as well.  Mark mentioned that husbands are unrealistic if they expect their wives to look at 50 what they looked like at 25.  After 4 children and a sweet tooth that she often satisfied, Lisa did not look like she had at 25 and I was unrealistic.  Since she broke her leg she has lost 40 pounds… and she still is not able to walk or put weight on her leg.  And she has done this in a healthy manner.  I know because I fix most of her meals at her direction.  I am excitedly looking forward to the day when Lisa’s leg has healed and we can hike together.  I want to hike in the mountains finding scenic waterfalls hidden among the rhododendron together.

It is my hope and prayer that someone out there can benefit from our story.  While I wish Lisa didn’t have to endure the pain of a broken leg, I am so thankful that God has moved through this difficult time to bring so much good.  And Lisa feels the same.  Our laughter and joy has simply exploded the past two months.  And we can only give God all the credit.  He has done marvelously, miraculously more than we could ever ask or imagine.  To Him be the glory, honor, praise and dominion forever and ever.  Amen!

PS. I strongly recommend Mark and Grace Driscoll’s book: Real Marriage – The Truth About Sex, Friendship, and Life Together.

Read Full Post »

When Does a Marriage Fail

Posted in Uncategorized, tagged , , , , on March 23, 2012| 4 Comments »

Since I am a reliability engineer, I know a lot about equipment failures.  For the majority of failures, what we see when the thing stops working is not when it fails.  The failure began earlier, often much earlier.  The pattern followed by equipment as it progresses from fully functional to a wreck is the same as marriages that die.  Armed with this knowledge, I believe we can be better prepared to intervene and save our marriages.  With divorce an all to common occurrence I think this is a worthy activity.

In our analogy let’s use a common piece of equipment that we are almost all familiar with – a car.  Initially our car runs fine.  In reliability terms we say it is performing its intended function.  In the marriage this is when life is good, husband and wife are actively engaged in each other’s lives.  Communication is good and mutual support and attentiveness is the norm.

As time progresses subtle changes take place.  For our car it could be that the brakes have worn significantly, our oil has become contaminated, or a wheel bearing has experienced heat and wear.  At some point the performance of our car  begins to suffer slightly.  It is not detectable yet, but the loss of function has started.  In a marriage a similar point is reached when stress and distractions begin to subtly pull the couple apart.  The list is a long one on what these can be – money issues, health problems, children’s needs / demands, work stresses, etc.  

At this point in our example we can actually head off a failure with rather simple steps.  By identifying and performing the correct preventive maintenance tasks or basic care tasks we can restore the full function of both our car and our marriage.  For our car we should routinely inspect it for wear in the brakes, tires, etc and all lube should be periodically changed and / or replenished.  In our marriage we should periodically and routinely inspect it for wear and tear from the stresses of life.  Our communication should also be periodically changed and / or replenished.  A regular date night and brief times away from home together are two important ingredients in our marriage basic care program.  Without these activities a small problem will grow over time.

Without good basic care and preventive maintenance activities, incipient failures progress to the point they begin to manifest themselves in ways that become detectable.  Our brakes will begin to squeak, our car will take longer to stop, minor irritants in our marriage will escalate into conflict and hurtful words.  Detecting these failures early is important in achieving a prompt and relatively simply resolution.  

Assuming the problems, be they vehicular or marital, are not addressed degradation will continue.  In a lot of equipment such as bearings a failure will accelerate as the debris from the original failure becomes the source of additional failure sites on a microscopic level.  In our marriages unresolved hurts introduce emotional pain and strained communication that accelerate toward a failure of the marriage. 

At some point the signs that are noticeable only to those most intimate with the marriage become obvious to family, friends, and even casual acquaintances.  Full functional failure is still preventable but only with prompt intervention and significant effort.  In the case of our brakes, instead of simply replacing brake pads we may have to turn rotors – a more intrusive and costly repair.  In a marriage it will likely include active intervention and support from family and friends and perhaps even professional counselling.  Again a more intrusive and costly repair.

The final stage is a complete failure.  For our car it means brakes locking up or ceasing to stop us followed closely by a loud crash.  In our marriage it means broken hopes, dreams, and emotional trauma as two persons who were once in love divorce and go their separate ways.

Recognizing that a marriage actual begins to fail much earlier and intervening at the earliest possible point can head off the painful and damaging results.  Here is a list of steps that can be taken to strengthen your marriage and ward off the decline so many couples experience.

Respect.  Mutual respect is an important ingredient in any healthy relationship, but even more so in a marriage.  Make up your mind that your mate is valuable and worthy of your esteem.  Think back to what drew you to them.  Think of what they are good at and dwell on these things.  And let them know that you value them.  We all have faults, but it does not help to dwell on our spouse’s faults.  Offer these up to God in prayer, but with your spouse focus on the positive.  (Eph 5:25-33)

Communication.  This includes all the verbal and non-verbal forms of communication.  Usually one person in the marriage talks more than the other.  Whichever you are, be intentional to do more of what you usually do less.  For the talker try to listen more.  For the quiet one, work to express yourself more.  Consider your non-verbal messages too. 

Identify and remove distractions.  This is necessary for enabling us to get to the true root causes of the problem.  Too much time and energy is wasted dealing with peripheral issues or the secondary effects of bad decisions rather than identifying and dealing with the underlying thought patterns and behaviours that caused the bad decisions.  Another way to approach this is to simplify your life.

Include Preventive Maintenance into your Marriage.  In the equipment realm Preventive Maintenance are those regular, often calendar-based activities undertaken to make sure that everything is performing as it should.  Discrepancies are addressed, usually with minor adjustments, and the equipment is restored to full function.  Marriages need the same regular care.  I mentioned a date night earlier, but it can be any technique where you and your spouse are engaged in time together, apart from distractions, and intentional about checking the vital signs of your marriage.

Fellowship.  Spend time with others of similar values, beliefs, and life situation in an interactive setting.  We cannot expect to do life alone either individually or as a married couple.  We are meant to live in community.  We have a large and close extended family and they form our primary area of fellowship, but we also have Lisa’s work family and there is our church family.

Develop Marriage Condition-monitoring into your personal reflection time.  Condition-monitoring simply looks for the telltale signs that identify that the function of equipment is beginning to deteriorate.  We can do the same thing in our marriage.  Here are a few suggestions. 

  • Check the temperature with the Romance Meter.  If the romance in your marriage has cooled, then look for the causes and address them.  Hugs, kisses at times other than…, touching, quality time alone are all aspects of the Romance Meter that we should check.  When these diminish or begin to be more rote than spontaneous it is time to dig deeper into causes and make some changes.  At this time the changes will usually be subtle, but the benefits can be oh so marvelous. 
  • Take a vibration check of the emotional stability.  If things are becoming a bit shaky in the emotional arena for either one or both of you (yes guys I said BOTH), then it is time to slow down, assess more deeply, and talk about it.
  • Gauge the communication depth.  If your discussions are shallow and don’t get to the issues and challenges of the day and work through toward support and understanding then you have uncovered an opportunity for improvement.  Talking only about the kids does not qualify for the depth needed.  We need to talk about the children and during the years we are raising a family it will be very high on the list of priorities.  For a healthy marriage it cannot become THE priority.  The priority must be the marriage itself. 

While there is more that can be said, I see I must wrap up for today.  Perhaps I will share some of Lisa’s and my story at a later date.  We have experienced much of the joy of marriage, but like all couples we have weathered our seasons of difficulty.  With God’s help and the prayers of family and friends we have weathered these and come out stronger in our commitment and love for each other.  It is my prayer for all married persons who read this that you will find comfort, solace, and a tidbit that will help you.  For those not married I encourage you to consider these suggestions for the day you either get married or in your times of supporting married friends.

God bless and may the light shine brightly where you tread.

Read Full Post »

« Newer Posts - Older Posts »