Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Archive for the ‘Spiritual Growth’ Category

Treasuring Your Wife

Posted in Marriage, Responsibility, Spiritual Growth, tagged , , , , , , , on June 8, 2015| Leave a Comment »

I love my wife.  I realized I loved her fairly early in our relationship and it was with great joy that she said yes to my marriage proposal after we had been dating about 5 months.  During this time I have never not loved Lisa.  I wish I could say that she has always felt loved, but I know that at times she has not.  This realization has been one arrived at through a rather drawn-out season of learning.  The Lord kept bringing me back to Ephesians 5:25 until I finally learned and acted upon His prompting to take love to another level.  Here is my post with my friend as we walk through Proverbs.  This is from Friday’s reading in chapter 5.

Proverbs 5:18.  “May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth.”
Lisa and I have been married for over 30 years.  Any couple that has been together for any time has had their share of difficulties.  We have had ours although in God’s grace, none have been too serious.  Probably our most persistent issue has been that we get too busy with our jobs, activities, and doing things for the kids that we forget to take time to nurture our marriage.  Make no mistake – the most important earthly relationship a married person has is the one with their spouse.
I went through a season beginning about 7 years ago that the message the Lord laid on my heart was Ephesians 5:25.  “Husbands love your wives as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself up for her…”   This went on for about 4 years.  During that time I repeatedly tried to “Band-Aid” an acceptable response.  I would take this prompting to mean that I needed to “do more” for Lisa, which I would do for a while, but I would soon drift back into busy-ness.  I would again notice the lack of passion and depth in our marriage and I would seek the Lord and He would point to the same verse.  Now I have sought to walk closely with the Lord for 32 years.  I know Him to be real.  He has actively guided me.  For the majority of the time prior to this, there were things He would bring to light that needed changing in me, sometimes it might take me a little while to get it right, but usually in short order He had brought about the change in me He desired and the next lesson would begin.  So for a single lesson to continue for 4 years was different and very humbling.  God had to eventually break me in a very painful and powerful manner.  You can read about it in depth in this blog in the post entitled “Broken Legs, Mended Hearts”.
Here are a few truths that I learned from that season that tie into this verse in Proverbs.
1) Our relationship with our wife is the best barometer of our relationship with God.  If we can’t get the relationship right with the most important human being who we can see, we will struggle with the relationship with the most important One who we happen to be unable to see yet.
2)  God knows the deep things that must be rooted out in our lives.  He loves us enough that He will do the work that needs to be done to get them out.
3)  The first step is not adding more “spiritual” things to our to-do list.  The first step is dying to self and allowing God to replace our wishes, wants, and desires with His desires.
There is an amazing thing that has happened since I reached a deeper place of dying to self and better serving Lisa.  God immediately put a fresh love for Lisa in my heart.  Before anything actually changed in our relationship, God was already making changes inside of me that would become the fertile ground that grew a renewed and deeper love between us.  In a practical way, my love began expressing itself in her love language again which is Quality Time.  My love language is Acts of Service which isn’t on Lisa’s love language radar at all, so all my work to try and show her love in my love language missed the mark.  As God worked in my heart I didn’t have to consciously think about how to show her love.  Since we have been through the Love Language training and recognize the truths of the Five Love Languages my brokenness now sought to effectively demonstrate itself to her.  However since our love had gotten stale and we both were so busy, we had forgotten the need to be intentional in this area.  Once I started truly dying to what I wanted, I became focused upon pleasing Lisa and our relationship has grown and blossomed.  It has been really great the past three years or so.
Oh, I almost forgot.  The fact that I was dying to my desires did not mean that my deepest desires now were totally neglected.  The good ones, the godly ones, the best ones now became the desire of my wife.  God began prompting Lisa to meet my needs at a much deeper level too.
There is a lot of godly wisdom in the verses of Proverbs 5, particularly about avoiding the temptations of the wayward or adulterous woman.  However I have found that if I focus upon doing the BEST thing, I don’t have to spend nearly as much time and effort on not doing all the wrong things.  Dying to self and loving your spouse in practical ways are two sides of the same coin.  Here’s to doing the BEST thing.
I hope you enjoy today’s reading.  Drop me a comment or ask a question if you would get a chance.  I’d love to interact with some of my readers.
Be blessed and be a blessing to someone today.

Read Full Post »

A Sweet, Sweet Fragrance

Posted in God, God Stories, Service, Spiritual Growth, Vision, tagged , , , , , , on June 5, 2015| Leave a Comment »

Two and a half years ago my wife and I felt prompted to make an addition to our home.  It seemed a little odd since we were facing an empty nest within 8 months as our youngest of four was about to graduate and head off to college.  As we continued to pray the nudge became a clarified vision and so we began the process.  The addition was to add a pool and a garage with an apartment over head.  We designed it, found a builder who worked wonderfully with us to get it done before the two weddings we had that year, and by Memorial Day we had a new swimming pool and pool house.  One of the most exciting aspects of the process for me was the opportunity to design and add the landscaping.

One of the coolest features we designed was a cedar pergola to connect the pool house with our home.  This turned out really nice creating a rather strong contrast of the red cedar against the grey-brown brick of the buildings.  Additionally it framed a small courtyard that needed the creative landscape touch.  One of the things I envisioned were vines climbing up the pergola and providing an additional degree of natural shading as well as seasonal color.  I found some plants that appeared like they would work and I added them into the plan.

Today, two years after completion of the project I regularly begin my day talking to the Lord on the pool house porch.  This morning I was struck by the wonderful fragrance that wafted in and around the little courtyard from one of the honeysuckles that we planted.  The plant has climbed the 12 feet to the top of the pergola and is covered in delicate pink blossoms.

As I breathed deeply I thought about how that little honeysuckle is like believers who grow into committed followers.  Two years ago the plant arrived in a pot that I easily held in the palm of my hand.  We were careful to plant it in good soil.  We amended the soil and added the appropriate fertilizer.  We also watered it whenever conditions warranted.  A regular task through the growing season has been the training of the plant.  You see honeysuckles spread broadly in their natural state.  They tend to be invasive and a nuisance.  We had in mind a vertical growth that looped up and over the pergola.  So on at least a weekly basis we have had to maneuver the branches into the correct direction.  Additionally we have pruned it removing dead and damaged growth as well as branches that weren’t heading in the right direction.

There are parallels with the growth and training of this little plant and followers of Jesus.  The start of our life in Christ is a very delicate time.  If the enemy can’t stop us from hearing and responding to Jesus’ call to save us, he will double down to keep us from growing in our faith.  He hates all Christians, but if he can prevent us from becoming effective, then at least he doesn’t have to worry about us working in tandem with God to expand the kingdom.  During this period of vulnerability it is crucial that new believers be properly connected to a vibrant body of believers who will ensure they are fed, nurtured, and encouraged.

A major challenge for new believers is the process of sanctification that we begin when we say YES to Jesus call upon our lives.  Salvation is God’s gift given the moment we say yes to Him.  Our new life in Christ begins then.  It would be wonderful if all bad habits and sin tendencies were immediately removed at that time too, but it doesn’t work that way.  My personal experience is that some of my sin tendencies disappeared immediately.  Some did not.  1 Thessalonians 4 talks about living to please God which we do as we sanctify ourselves from the old habits and sins.  In a very close comparison this is like the pruning that takes place on that little honeysuckle we planted.  Unhealthy branches and branches that aren’t going the right way have to be removed.  The same is true in our lives.  And these things take action on the part of the new believer usually in alignment with the body of believers they are connected to.

Time is also a similarity between our honeysuckle and the believer.  I have seen a few new believers “flame out.”  In every case they jumped forward with great enthusiasm and vigor, but they wilted within a relatively short time frame.  They had not taken the time to grow, to develop the roots of faith needed to withstand persecution and the various attacks of the enemy.  Jesus talks about this in the parable of the sower see Matthew 13:1 – 23, but especially verses 20 & 21.  As I mentioned before the early stage of plant growth is a very vulnerable time.  The roots must develop depth to be able to withstand a dry spell.

I have a lot of perennials that I have planted.  One of the worst things you can do for a perennial is water it too often.  This results in shallow roots with no depth.  If you then leave for a week or two and there is no rain you are liable to return to dead plants.  This is one of the reasons that the Lord doesn’t just make life all fun and games.  We must experience times of difficulty, challenge, and dryness to cause us to persevere, stretch ourselves, and grow our faith.

Finally I mentioned the wonderful fragrance coming from the honeysuckle.  In the old testament the burning of incense was a prescribed act of worship.  Symbolically we view the drifting up of the incense smoke and fragrance as representative of our prayers and offerings rising to God.  As we spend time in the Word of God, the Bible; as we sit under good, solid teaching; as we apply ourselves to serving others; as we seek to hear and obey God, we will grow in our faith.  It may be all small steps, but they are steps none-the-less.  We begin to take on the mind of Christ more and more.  We are like that honeysuckle stretching, reaching, and growing.  And in our season to blossom, we will burst forth in fragrant, beautiful bloom.  Our devotion and love of the Father will manifest itself in the flower and fruit of a life established and growing in Him.

Let me finish the story about why God gave us the vision to expand.  About the time we finished building, my sister’s house sold essentially out of the blue.  They looked around for some place to live, but that wasn’t working out.  Again that nudge from the Lord convinced us to offer up our home.  The day after our youngest son moved into College, my sister and her family moved in with us.  The extra room made it work fine.  And then 8 months later, our oldest son who had moved away for what seemed like a good job opportunity, realized closer to family was important.  So their family of 4 moved in with us.  So when the vision was given we wondered why soon-to-be empty nesters would be adding on rather than downsizing.  We didn’t know, but we clearly sensed the Lord’s leading so we obeyed.  And because we did we have been blessed to grow so much closer to our grandsons, son, and daughter-in-law as well as my sister, brother-in-law, nieces, and nephew.  I’m convinced that despite the challenges that three families living together will invariably bring, we have all grown through this experience.  And I believe that part of that sweet fragrance is the love and service we have given to one another these past two years.

Be blessed my friend and be a blessing to someone today.

Our Fragrant Honeysuckle

Our Fragrant Honeysuckle

Climbing the pergola this honeysuckle looks and smells wonderful.

Climbing the pergola this honeysuckle looks and smells wonderful.

Read Full Post »

Listen to be Wise – Proverbs 1

Posted in God, Marriage, Spiritual Growth, tagged , , , , on June 4, 2015| Leave a Comment »

I have a friend who agreed to walk through Proverbs with me over the month of June.  We are going to each read a chapter a day and then share our thoughts about one verse from the chapter that impressed us.  Here are thoughts from Proverbs, Chapter 1 on June 1.

Chase’s choice – Proverbs 1:7  “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge: but fools despise wisdom and instruction.”
      “The fear of the Lord” here to me is submission to the Lord, an open heart and mind to him. My bible states when we fear something, we either run from it or submit to it. I agree, my salvation was very similar to this as a lot of people’s may have been the same way.
      Once we have the fear of the Lord, it is a healthy fear as the fear we have of electricity or parents.  It is a healthy fear or respect which causes you to act appropriately. But while seeking wisdom the fear or submission unto the Lord is the controlling principle of wisdom.  This principle should not be abandoned and a person cannot just fully focus on the idea that we must just acquire wisdom alone. I believe that is where the fools despising wisdom comes in.  They do not begin with that respect or appropriate fear.
My choice – Proverbs 1:5 “let the wise listen and add to their learning, and let the discerning get guidance.”  and Proverbs 1:33 “but whoever listens to me will live in safety and be at ease, without fear of harm.”
On proverbs 1:7 you made a wise choice.  I always picture God’s awesome majesty, holiness, and righteousness when I consider “the fear of the Lord”.  Romans 3:23 says that “all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God”.  That being the case, we all have reason to fear the judgment that we correctly deserve.  The hope of favor with God can then begin to make us desire to walk right and submit.  When we combine His majesty, holiness, and righteousness with His love, mercy, and grace – we have the awesome combination that causes us to joyously submit.
My verse was verse 5, “let the wise listen and add to their learning, and let the discerning get guidance.”  The last verse, verse 33, also echoes the theme.  In verse 33 it is wisdom itself speaking saying, “but whoever listens to me will live in safety and be at ease, without fear of harm.”  Verse 5 tells us what we are to do.  Verse 33 tells us what the results will be.  Wisdom is the correct and consistent application of knowledge.  I have met many very intelligent people who weren’t really very wise.  They struggled with making the correct application of the vast knowledge they possessed.  I love knowledge, but I have learned that I would rather be wise than just smart.
The common thread in these two verses is listening.  It’s funny, but I spent a lot of my younger married years listening to experts about things, but I spent the majority of my time with my wife and family telling rather than listening.  The Lord has shown me that my wife and even my children can be excellent dispensers of truth and wisdom.  That doesn’t take away from trying to learn from experts, but it means that I should not overlook or despise the sources of wisdom the Lord will use close to me.
One more thought that you may have also heard.  God gave us two ears versus only one mouth.  Wisdom is using this reminder that we are to listen twice as much as we are to talk.  I haven’t studied it so thoroughly as to say if it is exactly 67% listening to 33% talking, but I know the general rule is true.
Be blessed today and be a blessing.

Read Full Post »

Turn Toward the Sun

Posted in God, God Stories, Holy Spirit, Jesus Christ, Spiritual Growth, The Father, tagged , , , , on May 28, 2015| 2 Comments »

It is a coolish late spring morning where I live.  As I slipped outside into the early dawn my shorts and t-shirt provided slightly less warmth than I needed, but the beauty of the pre-sunrise sky drew me in and kept me from going back inside.  As I walked I meditated upon my study the night before on spiritual growth and the classical disciplines which help us in that growth.  As I look back on my life I can see that it has been a series of growth spurts and plateaus.  It is probably much like a tree which grows rapidly during the spring and summer and then rests through the fall and winter.  I suspect we all have “growth rings” of a sort.  I recognized two other things.  Deeper intimacy with the Lord and increased practice of one, and usually more, of the spiritual disciplines were present during the times of growth.

There is an essential order to the process.  It is crucial that we recognize and keep before us the goal of our life, the goal of spiritual growth is to grow in our intimacy with the Lord.  Jesus’ death on the cross was not simply so that we could go to heaven one day.  No, His death was to remove the curse of sin which separated us from the Father and opened the door to a life of intimacy with Him.  The curse is removed immediately, but intimacy comes over time as we collaborate with the work of the Holy Spirit inside us.  So the essential order is 1) accept Jesus as Lord and Savior, 2) make intimacy with God our primary goal in life, 3) practice those activities which lead to greater knowledge of and intimacy with the Lord, and then 4) experience all the benefits, privileges, and responsibilities of a life surrendered to Him.  The benefits, privileges, and responsibilities begin showing up as soon as we begin our spiritual journey, but what I experience today is so much more than what I did when I was a young Christian.

I had been exposed to small doses of the classical disciplines over the first couple of years of my faith walk by more mature believers, but the real breakthrough came when someone gave me the book, Celebration of Discipline – The PATH to SPIRITUAL GROWTH by Richard Foster.  It is succinct, well-researched, and written in a way that I could easily understand.  I recommend it to anyone seriously desiring to grow spiritually but unsure what steps to take.  In the near future I suspect my posts will include things we discuss in our Home Group since we will be studying this over the next three months.  I am very excited because I sense the Lord wants to do something new and fresh in our group and in me.

As I continued to walk outside a shiver hit me due to the chill in the air even as my excitement was building.  I stopped and turned to look at the sunrise just as the sun was becoming visible through the trees on the horizon.  Immediately the chill was gone and I sensed a warmth on the outside that mirrored the warmth I was feeling on the inside as I had been meditating and praying to the Lord.  In that moment I was struck by the fact that as we look to the Son, Jesus, and grow in intimacy with Him, God the Father draws us into His warm embrace and fills us with His grace more and more.

At Pentecost, God poured out the Holy Spirit upon the disciples as tongues of fire.  So it is when we make it our life goal to live in intimacy with Jesus, the Holy Spirit will warm us with His Holy fire.  The closer we get to Jesus, the more we surrender ourselves to the work of the Holy Spirit in and through us.  His fire is a refining fire though.  It will burn up the chaff in our life – those things that are not God’s best for us.  But with the purging and refining comes something so much better, so much greater – a deeper, richer faith and an intimacy with the Lover of our Soul that we were created for.

And that, my friend, is glorious!

Go forth to be blessed and be a blessing to someone God puts in your path today!

A pre-dawn sunrise viewed from our SC home.

A pre-dawn sunrise viewed from our SC home.

Read Full Post »

« Newer Posts